Thursday, January 26, 2006

And As A Lovely Parting Gift...

I got an email this morning from one of the pastors at our church asking if I'd cook for an event in March. For those of you who don't know, I have, at some point in the last two years, morphed into my mama in that I enjoy cooking large quantities of food for large quantities of people. It's a fairly insane thing for me to enjoy because it takes a lot of time - and in my life, at least lately, the phrase "spare time" has become an oxymoron - but it's fun to me. I don't know how else to explain it.

The event at church is for adoptive parents and people who are considering adoption. Our church has a really active ministry in this area, finding homes for kids from Guatemala, Ukraine, etc., and this "gathering" in March will give people a chance to learn more about the process and hear from people who have actually navigated all the red tape that's involved.

A couple of nights ago David mentioned that he'd love to have another child if he or she could enter the world at age three. I pointed out the relative impossibility of such a wish, but I'm sort of on board with him because, you know, I'm old. If I got pregnant now, I would be 37 when the second child came along, and while I would love for Alex to have a sibling, I can't figure out how we'd handle the logistics. I especially can't figure out how David and I could tote the new baby around while using our CANES and WALKERS. Because we're OLD.

And I know, I know, that we can trust God to work out all the details if we do have another child, but my word, people, have you not heard me talk about how bone-crushingly TIRED I am? And don't tell me that if I'm so tired then I shouldn't be cooking for 50-75 people, because said cooking gives me precious zone-out time that is actually quite therapeutic and refreshing. I'm weird like that, and I've never contended otherwise.

Anyway, I emailed David to see if the date of the dinner worked for him - because if I cook, then he will have to babysit that night. He wrote me back and said sure, fine with him, but what did I think?

I replied that I'd like to do it, shouldn't be too hard, etc., and then I had a thought:

MAYBE THEY'LL GIVE US A BABY!!!! For cooking all the food!!!!

Y'all - it would be perfect.

No morning sickness, no feet the size of shoe boxes, no hip that throbs with the force of all nature.

Even better, we could fulfill David's desire for a ready-made three year old.

Oh, I believe it to be a delightful idea. I'll cook up some Asian pork tenderloin with delicious sides for the dinner, serve it with a smile, and little Guadalupe will come home with us afterwards.

I'm kidding, of course.

I think.


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